No End To The Road, Kulturforum Witten, Germany
From January to December 2024, I undertook a period of research and professional development in Witten to create experiential spaces for new digital forms of expression. This is a visual journal of research projects, preliminary studies, and rough workings I am investigating during my stay.
Dancing Pixels vs. Deutsche Bahn
My Criteria for Bacteria Hysteria in a Cafeteria
Thousands of petri dishes, each harbouring a bustling community of bacteria.
Shadows and Light
Shadows and Light is an introspective self-portrait that delves into the complex landscape of living with complex post-traumatic stress disorder. The self portrait captures the nuanced interplay between the enveloping shadows of past traumas and the ephemeral glimpses of light that symbolise moments of healing and understanding. Through a blend of stark contrasts and subtle transitions, the portrait explores the depths of vulnerability and resilience inherent in the human spirit. Composed of ten different self portraits captured in different moods and moments, the mix reflects the layered experiences of memory, emotion, and healing. Textures vary, symbolising the uneven terrain of the journey. Dark, heavy tones represent the weight of historical pain, while brighter tones emerge as symbols of hope and renewal. It offers a window into the soul of someone navigating the delicate balance of darkness and light within themselves, providing a poignant reminder of the strength required to confront one’s innermost fears and scars.
Brisbane Portrait Prize, State Library of Queensland, Brisbane, Australia
Out From The Mist [curated by Mental Illness Fellowship of Australia for Mental Health Week], Judith Wright Centre of Contemporary Arts, Brisbane, Australia
Head On Photo Festival, Bondi Pavilion, Sydney, Australia
Kruger National Park vs Kruger National Park vs Kruger National Park
Pixels dancing at Kruger National Park, South Africa
Ephemeral Lattices of Being
This year, during my fellowship, I delved deeply into the intersection of biology, physics, and philosophy, exploring the tantalising connections between life and quantum mechanics. At its most fundamental level, all living organisms are composed of atoms and molecules that obey the principles of quantum mechanics. However, the relationship between life and the quantum world goes beyond the mere composition of matter. Emerging studies suggest that certain biological processes might leverage subtle quantum effects, such as coherence and entanglement, to achieve remarkable efficiency and precision. While still speculative and actively debated, these insights have given rise to the field of quantum biology, offering a profound reimagining of life’s deepest connections to the Universe.
Through my research, I examined classical physics’ deterministic framework alongside the probabilistic nature of quantum mechanics. Central to this exploration was the concept of coherence, a state in which particles can exist in multiple positions or paths simultaneously, only to “collapse” into a single outcome upon interaction or measurement. This phenomenon may underpin processes such as photosynthesis, where quantum coherence could allow excitons—quasiparticles formed when light excites electrons in chlorophyll—to explore multiple energy pathways simultaneously. This ability to select the most efficient route may explain the extraordinarily high efficiency of energy transfer in plants, algae, and certain bacteria. Similarly, I investigated magnetoreception in migratory birds, where quantum entanglement within cryptochrome proteins might enable these creatures to sense Earth’s magnetic field—a potential quantum guide for navigation.
These speculative phenomena raise profound questions about life itself. Could the intrinsic complexity, adaptability, and order of living systems emerge from quantum coherence and other quantum effects? If so, life might not simply be a product of classical physics but a vivid testament to the Universe’s most enigmatic principles. This perspective invites a philosophical reimagining of life as an emergent masterpiece of coherence and potential, woven from the quantum threads that shape the cosmos.
My work also touched on the possibility that quantum effects played a role in life’s origin, perhaps facilitating the efficient self-assembly of biomolecules and accelerating the emergence of self-organising structures. This speculative lens reframes life not as a separate construct imposed on nature but as an intricate interplay of probabilistic potentialities and coherent order—an active participant in a larger cosmic framework. Such a perspective celebrates life as a dynamic expression of the Universe’s capacity to self-organise and flourish, resonating with themes of interconnectedness, adaptability, and creativity.
Through these explorations, I sought to bridge scientific inquiry with philosophical wonder, considering the implications of quantum biology for our understanding of existence. Whether or not these quantum effects are ultimately proven to play a role in living systems, they invite us to view life as more than a mechanical consequence of physical laws. Instead, life becomes a profound expression of the Cosmos’s potential for coherence, interconnectedness, and beauty—a celebration of the Universe’s remarkable ability to flourish against all odds.
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Experiment #9
An Ode to My Absent Whole
I’ve always felt adrift in an endless sea, waiting to glimpse an island that might not exist. There’s an absence—a hollow echo where something essential should be. My heart, in its wisdom or desperation, built walls to protect itself—walls that began to feel less like safety and more like a prison.
In 2020, I took a step I had avoided for decades. I saw two psychologists and was diagnosed with complex post-traumatic stress disorder, the quiet shadow that had shaped my life since childhood. I wrote a timeline of events—a sprawling record of pain—which was given to the police to pursue a case. But this wasn’t the healing I needed. It was perhaps a necessary reckoning, but it didn’t fill the emptiness.
My healing came from a moment I didn’t expect. After finishing the timeline, I sat on a balcony, watching the leaves on a tree dance in the wind. For the first time, I wasn’t just observing the world—I was in it. A part of its rhythm, its delicate, beautiful harmony. In that moment, I imagined myself atop a mountain, holding a glowing orb: my soul, my essence, my core. For the first time in my life, I felt whole. I wanted to share this orb, to be seen, to be held, to know what it meant to belong.
I think this yearning is universal—a search for connection, a longing to belong, a quiet hope to rebuild what’s been lost. It ties us together, weaving a fragile thread of shared vulnerability through the vast solitude of our individual lives. There’s a melancholic beauty in this—an ache that reminds us of our capacity to feel deeply, to hope against despair, and to find meaning even in the quiet spaces of our longing.
This year, the ache returned, heavier than ever. My soul felt fractured. I’m scared it’s shattered beyond repair. Writing another 40,000-word account of my life wasn’t an option this time. Instead, I turned to the fragments of my life—photos capturing moments both vivid and blurred—and pieced them together into a collage.
The collage became my way of saying, Here I am, still learning what it means to be wanted, to be lovable, to feel safe. I didn’t mean for it to be so dark. Maybe that’s just where I am right now. Or maybe I’m just not great at editing. But the process reminded me of something: belonging might not be about finding the island but about building one—piece by imperfect piece, from what we carry and what we share.
Maybe I’ll never fully understand what it means to feel whole. But I do know this: the pieces I hold, broken or imperfect, are still mine to shape. I want my soul back. I don’t want to be a shadow again.
(I know this is some melancholic bullshit, but it is how I feel at the moment.)
Detailed views:
Hier & Jetzt, Gustav Lübcke Museum, Hamm
Oscillations of Being (Work in Progress)
The interactive sculpture explores the delicate balance between order and chaos, a theme that resonates not only in physics but also in the fundamental nature of existence. Each balloon, containing a bouncy ball, serves as a microcosm of potential energy, suspended in a moment of tension and poised for activation by the simplest gesture. The unpredictable movements of the bouncy balls within their elastic boundaries echo the uncertainties that shape both the physical world and human experience.
The idea of blending the light-heartedness of play with reflections on joy and wonder in the unexpected emerged from a year-long fascination with quantum mechanics, pixels, and Lego—each grounded in the construction of complex systems from fundamental building blocks. Quantum mechanics, which describes the probabilistic behaviour of subatomic particles, suggests that at its most fundamental level, reality is built from discrete quanta of energy and information. This led to an obsession with quantum coherence—the phenomenon where particles exist in a superposition of states, with their wavefunctions ‘in phase’ with one another.
From a poetic and metaphysical perspective, quantum coherence can be viewed as a reflection of the interconnectedness of all things. Life, in this perspective, manifests the coherence inherent in the Universe, with living organisms functioning as intricate systems that bridge quantum potentiality with classical reality. Life and consciousness, then, are unique in their ability to straddle both realms: the quantum world, where possibilities are endless, and the classical world, where definitive actions and outcomes unfold. In this way, life may be viewed as a system that navigates between these two domains, using coherence to traverse the uncertainties of the quantum realm.
In essence, this work encapsulates the delicate tension between order and unpredictability, mirroring the fundamental principles of quantum mechanics. The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, which asserts the inherent limits of measurement, finds its playful metaphor in the unpredictable paths of the bouncy balls, suspended in moments of potential energy. Like quantum systems in superposition, they exist in a state of readiness, awaiting interaction to reveal their trajectories. The installation thus becomes a living reflection of the dual nature of existence itself—structured and governed by laws, yet teeming with randomness and possibility. By inviting viewers to engage with this balance, the work offers a poetic meditation on the hidden forces that shape both the physical world and human experience, reminding us that, much like quantum particles, we too navigate the uncertain yet wondrous space between order and chaos.
Mukail’s Time
I’ve always wanted to write a sci-fi book, but one set firmly in contemporary times—a story that could resonate with the here and now while exploring timeless, cosmic themes. This year, I devoted myself to bringing that vision to life, completing Mukail’s Time, a novel that blends survival, imagination, and the intricacies of time travel. The manuscript is now with a developmental editor in the U.S., marking an exciting step in its journey.
Mukail’s Time tells the story of Mukail, a young child navigating a turbulent home life, who discovers solace—and an escape—in a seemingly ordinary Rubik’s Cube. Yet, this object holds more than meets the eye; it serves as a portal to realms beyond imagination, connecting Mukail’s life to a much larger cosmic design. Parallel to Mukail’s story is that of Zimmer, a time traveler from a distant future where history is not just studied but manipulated. Zimmer is sent back to the 21st century—Mukail’s era—to investigate human convictions. As the narrative unfolds, Mukail and Zimmer’s paths intertwine in unexpected ways.
Writing this book allowed me to explore deep questions about resilience, connection, and the delicate interplay between individual actions and the broader forces shaping our existence. It was a deeply fulfilling process to weave a story that balances the wonder of imagination with the poignancy of human struggle, all set against the backdrop of the early 21st century. I’m thrilled to see Mukail’s Time take its next steps.
Thank you No End To The Road!
For me, the idea of learning and sharing skills, knowledge, and networks, is following in the footsteps of the Greek philosophers who understood that living a meaningful life is what life is all about.
